Why oh why do I read other people's blogs and feel the need to get online and post something completely to the contrary? It's not people that I don't know, don't talk to that I feel the need to 'enlighten'... it's people I know and often like. I read something where someone has watched some documentary or done some research and now they feel something is SO wrong. 'I'm boycotting this company or think that this drug is SO bad or this way of doing something is SO harmful.' And they try to come across as sounding 'non-judgmental': "I mean, if you don't have a personal problem with it, then I can't stop you or convince you it's wrong. But you know, with all the stuff I've read and seen, this is just the conclusion I've come to."
...
And you just know what they're really thinking is: "Maybe if you cared about *insert favorite cause here* then you would take the time to read news articles and watch documentaries."
...
that are written by people. that are just about always biased no matter how neutral they try to be. And often just obviously aren't.
And the first thought into my head (after thinking about how I totally disagree) is: "hey, I should write on MY blog just to show the error of their ways"
...
haha, me and my big mouth.
...
or maybe it's: me and my big ego?
Who do I think I am anyway? ;)
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Deployment Daze
It's been awhile. Oh well, I'm back. I also have been feeling the 'need' to blog lately, because of Athan being gone. I'm an external processor and just need to put things outside of myself to think through them. So here I am again.
While on vacation in MI we found out Athan's deployment had been changed and moved up. We rushed home to SC, packed our house in a week and came to KY. Had a day here with him, getting settled in at his folk's house and then took him to the Nashville airport on August 14. He left for training the next day. And now he is in Afghanistan.
It's a 6 month deployment. We're maybe 10 days in? Not really fun to think of it that way.
While he's gone I have set some goals for myself: lose weight, finish baby scrapbooks, learn to sew, get a nose ring. Maybe some other stuff will get thrown in there.
As of right now I have been faithfully going to the gym 4-5 times a week. I think I'm averaging walking/jogging 12-15 miles a week. And doing weights for abs, arms and legs each time I'm there. My reward: an uninterrupted, hot shower in the ladies locker room! My kids love the 'play park' where they are carefully supervised so it's 2 hrs of 'me' time every day... very much needed.
No sewing lessons yet, but there is plenty of time. Right now we're still establishing a regular schedule.
Seth is in preschool at Heritage, he loves it! He goes 3 mornings a week and I am thrilled for him. He tends to be one of those children that learns best from someone other than his parents (Athan thinks so just as much as I do).
In reading other folks blogs, it's funny to me how different perspectives can be. Natural childbirth, Rx drug-free living, homeschooling... all *seem* good and right and *Christian*. I feel lots of guilt when I start comparing my choices/circumstances to those of others.
For instance: I was induced with all three of my babies. My blood pressure gets high enough that I get put on bed-rest in the third trimester and high enough that it is unsafe to wait for labor to start on it's own. Due to long, pitocin induced labors I've had epidurals. *insert guilt feelings for not being able to 'go natural' and 'do it on my own'*
For instance: I was home schooled and admire those who do. But I have absolutely NO desire to home school my children. At all. *insert guilt feelings for not wanting to 'mother' correctly*
For instance: I have some extreme post-partum depression and take a Rx for it. No I don't want to harm my children, haven't had those feelings; however, you could pretty much check off every single physical symptom for ppd and apply it to me, as well as feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness... *insert guilt feelings for 'needing' a drug to help me cope*
But I'm starting to think something new for me- and maybe you've already reached this pinnacle: who cares if other women/moms do it differently? who cares if I don't live up to the 'standard' that so many unknowingly set? The only thing I am called to as a wife and mother is to glorify God. As long as I am obedient to Him, then so what if it looks different for me than for you?
As a chronic 'people-pleaser', non-confrontational, abused-child, this is a big deal for me.
On a completely different note, I'm compiling a list of 'Things Not to Say to Someone Whose Spouse is Deployed'. Stay tuned for that later. ;)
While on vacation in MI we found out Athan's deployment had been changed and moved up. We rushed home to SC, packed our house in a week and came to KY. Had a day here with him, getting settled in at his folk's house and then took him to the Nashville airport on August 14. He left for training the next day. And now he is in Afghanistan.
It's a 6 month deployment. We're maybe 10 days in? Not really fun to think of it that way.
While he's gone I have set some goals for myself: lose weight, finish baby scrapbooks, learn to sew, get a nose ring. Maybe some other stuff will get thrown in there.
As of right now I have been faithfully going to the gym 4-5 times a week. I think I'm averaging walking/jogging 12-15 miles a week. And doing weights for abs, arms and legs each time I'm there. My reward: an uninterrupted, hot shower in the ladies locker room! My kids love the 'play park' where they are carefully supervised so it's 2 hrs of 'me' time every day... very much needed.
No sewing lessons yet, but there is plenty of time. Right now we're still establishing a regular schedule.
Seth is in preschool at Heritage, he loves it! He goes 3 mornings a week and I am thrilled for him. He tends to be one of those children that learns best from someone other than his parents (Athan thinks so just as much as I do).
In reading other folks blogs, it's funny to me how different perspectives can be. Natural childbirth, Rx drug-free living, homeschooling... all *seem* good and right and *Christian*. I feel lots of guilt when I start comparing my choices/circumstances to those of others.
For instance: I was induced with all three of my babies. My blood pressure gets high enough that I get put on bed-rest in the third trimester and high enough that it is unsafe to wait for labor to start on it's own. Due to long, pitocin induced labors I've had epidurals. *insert guilt feelings for not being able to 'go natural' and 'do it on my own'*
For instance: I was home schooled and admire those who do. But I have absolutely NO desire to home school my children. At all. *insert guilt feelings for not wanting to 'mother' correctly*
For instance: I have some extreme post-partum depression and take a Rx for it. No I don't want to harm my children, haven't had those feelings; however, you could pretty much check off every single physical symptom for ppd and apply it to me, as well as feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness... *insert guilt feelings for 'needing' a drug to help me cope*
But I'm starting to think something new for me- and maybe you've already reached this pinnacle: who cares if other women/moms do it differently? who cares if I don't live up to the 'standard' that so many unknowingly set? The only thing I am called to as a wife and mother is to glorify God. As long as I am obedient to Him, then so what if it looks different for me than for you?
As a chronic 'people-pleaser', non-confrontational, abused-child, this is a big deal for me.
On a completely different note, I'm compiling a list of 'Things Not to Say to Someone Whose Spouse is Deployed'. Stay tuned for that later. ;)
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